It’s an unfortunate fact of life that parenthood comes with no instructions. It can be tough to balance everything in life, especially since every father-child relationship has its own unique challenges. Although there are no clear-cut methods to successful parenthood, there are some habits you can develop as a father to ensure that you are prioritizing the right things, and to guarantee that your family sees you as a real hero.1- Being consistent
It may seem like children love the inconsistency of chaos, but what kids really need the most is a solid structure to learn and grow from. For that reason, consistency in parenting is vital to a child's sense of security, and integral to their behavioral development.
There are two important aspects to behaving consistently as a father. The first is to ensure that what you say is actually what you do. Every child needs to believe she has a dependable father, so if you promise you’ll make it to the soccer game or take her to the zoo or make her favorite dinner, it’s important to follow through no matter what comes up in the meantime. If your child believes your word, trust will soon follow. The second side to consistency is structure in discipline.
Remember that your kids aren’t perfect -- despite what you may think -- and they need guidance. It can be hard to discipline your children because you’re ready to stand at their defense no matter what. But remember that rules and structure are important in life and the earlier they learn that, the easier their lives will be. Rules are there for a reason and you need to make sure your children understand this.
2- Scheduling family recreation
Although it's necessary to work hard all week, you also need to plan some fun activities for downtime and stick to them. It is far too easy to just assume that family time will come naturally when the weekend arrives. Unfortunately, work spillover, visits from family members or home improvement projects -- just to name a few scenarios -- can easily take that time away.
Not to mention that as your kids develop their own social schedules, they’ll quickly let quality time with their families slip away. For this reason, advanced planning is crucial in maintaining this important aspect of your family life. Just like you’ll keep New Year’s resolutions more often if you write them down as a promise, making appointments with your family will make time with them a priority -- for both you and them.
3- Keeping stress to yourself
This can be difficult, but the fact is there are better outlets for your stress than your children. Kids shouldn’t have to be burdened with adult troubles. They have enough to deal with just being kids; growing, learning, exploring, and evolving. Rather than sharing your difficulties with them, keep your time with them about them. Try to keep your work or financial stress to yourself and don’t let it affect your attitude when you’re around your kids.
In order to do this, find a different outlet for your stress that you can use before you see them. Go to the gym on the way home and let it out on a punching bag or stop at your favorite coffee shop and spend a few minutes unwinding with the newspaper. Whatever it takes, your kids will appreciate seeing a fresh face and a positive attitude when you get home.
Also, consider how your kids might be able to help you calm down. You don’t always have to be doing something in order to have an impact on your kids. Rather than focusing on activities all the time, recognize that sometimes naps in front of the television can be just as touching for your kids and can do wonders in helping to bring you back down to earth.
4- Staying involved
Being involved with your kids is often twisted to mean that you ought to do the morning carpool and attend soccer games. Although this is true, there is much more to involvement with your kids than just being a personal taxi and cheerleader to them. Watch the soccer game, but also listen to school stories. Hear what your kids have to say, know their interests and their friends. Being involved seems like a no-brainer when it comes to parenthood, but it’s so easy to forget.
If your kids feel important enough to garner your interest, this will boost their confidence, their trust in you and their willingness to share the details of their own lives with you. All these things will give you more opportunities to guide your children and keep them out of trouble. They will also serve as invaluable memories when your kids are all grown up. The childhood years will pass quickly for you, but your kids will remember how you spent them forever.
5- Teaching
There’s something especially touching about learning. Learning something new improves self-confidence and is a lot of fun. For the teacher, there is a special feeling of pride in seeing how you helped create ability. If you show your kids how to do things you will create a special bond between the two of you. You may think you don’t know much, but whatever tidbits you can pass along will be much treasured by your kids. Do you play guitar? Are you a master at crosswords? Can you change the oil in the car? Your kids may learn this stuff in life anyway, but if you're the teacher, they'll not only remember the skill, they'll remember the great teacher who gave them that knowledge.
6- Creating family rituals
Because kids are so impressionable, structure can be very important to how they learn and grow. It can also instill a sense of importance in what goes on in the home. Establish a firm supper time when you all sit together at the table, a time for a story before bed, game night or even an evening where the entire family watches a television show together. Doing this will ensure that the event will be known as “family time” and that it will stick out as something sacred for your children.
from askmen.com (article and photo)
Article Suggested By: Mitchell P., Little Rock, AK
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